Monday, February 26, 2007

Desperate Times Call for Desperate Measures

A message for my sister Sarah: You know how I told you that I’d keep those late night doughnut runs a secret? Well, I lied, but only to benefit the masses. Sometimes one must be sacrificed for the benefit of all. I learned that on Buffy the Vampire Slayer… and in life.

You see Sar, you’re generally very healthy; you’re all about low-fat, low-carb, low-sugar, low-calorie. In fact, most the time, you eat nothing but kale and bark. But I know… I know about the doughnuts, late at night… oh the shame, pulling up to the drive through window at Krispy Kreme, you peering out from under the hood of your sweatshirt, “Gimme the donuts,” you growl at some skinny, pimple-faced boy who, under normal circumstances, would immediately fall in love with you. He scurries away, in fear, returning only when he has filled your order—six glazed, six jelly-filled.

Shame no more, lil sis. You can now hold your head high during those late-night doughnut binges because, according to MSNBC (props to Keni for finding this article), Krispy Kreme has launched the whole-wheat doughnut.

With only 180 calories, this caramel-flavored, whole-wheat doughnut is smothered in Krispy Kreme’s original glaze. Now, you can use the words “healthy” and “doughnut” together without it being an oxymoron. (Because if it says it's whole-wheat, it must be good for you, right?)

Dreams really do come true, Sarah. Dreams really do come true...

3 comments:

Lou's Sister said...

Minor correction...the late night runs were actually to Dunkin Donuts and I would only order one (usually a strawberry frosted if you were curious). The pimple-faced worker was actually a middle-aged Indian and he would always throw two extras in the bag. 550 extra calories was not a reason to let them go to waste. What can I say, I love donuts?

Lou said...

Look Sarah... I just wrote it... I never claimed it was true ;)

@ said...

dear lou's sister-

i recommend the dunkin donuts apple fritter.

sincerely,
@