We both know it's rare that I write a post after I've been out drinking. But, this is totally weird and I wanted to tell someone.
All I want is a microwavable egg roll. Unfortunately, every time I put an egg roll on a plate and in the microwave, the plate breaks in half! I have been microwaving these plates for years. They never broke before! What the hell? Did I enter some alternative reality between the bar and my apartment where my plates are no longer microwave-safe? The first time I just thought it was a coincident... but then it happened a second time.
What am I supposed to do? I'm hungry.