Monday, November 19, 2007

You Are On Fire

I am living in my head these days. So when I was “running” with Meg tonight I had several very philosophical moments when I would say something then I would repeat it slowly, using words with fewer syllables, and punctuation it with a reflective, “Yes. That’s it,” as though I had just proven String Theory or developed a cure cancer or devised a plan to save the pheasants.

Anyway, I detoured through the Jewel post-run because I was rambling on and Meg needed some groceries and she offered to buy me ice cream (usually something I only do when I’m alone). Since I was sans my money, I took her up on it because that’s what I wanted for dinner. Yes. I wanted ice cream for dinner. You wouldn’t know it to look at me this week, but that is the space my head is in. My head is in the “ice cream for dinner" space. Go ahead, judge me.

See? This is why I buy and eat ice cream alone.

Anyway, to further fuck up this story and reveal how much crazy actually resides in this here head o’ mine, I had this revelation (an “ah ha” moment for the Oprahites) while we were standing in the frozen food aisle:
You know Meg, when I get weird and depressed and all up in my head like I am now, I have this obsessive need to buy diet books and exercise DVDs. This might have made sense two years ago (pre-my fabulous running self) but it doesn’t really make sense for a person who works out five or six days a week to buy these things. (Or does it?)
What we have here, dear readers, is the identification of a pattern of behavior... or me thinks the crazy is always the same. Sadness = excessive focus on body image. Excessive focus on body image = obsessive and impulsive purchasing of diet and fitness paraphernalia. And least we not forget the ice cream... that simply must be a piece of this puzzle.

And that’s not even the real issue.

The real issue is my j-o-b.

4 comments:

Odd1Out said...

I think everyone gets a little blue when the weather turns gray like it has. Eating ice cream for dinner, well, it is better then drinking. Better then drinking and eating ice cream... yep, I had pecan ice cream and bourbon last night for dinner...

Lindy said...

Your writing has been rather brilliant this week...or at worst, hellified entertaining.

And I too watched the Bachelor last night, for the first time since the final episode last season.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHASHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Verdict in: Men still suck! And we women still fall for them anyway!

L Sass said...

I tend to buy ice cream and fitness magazines TOGETHER when I'm down. How messed up is that?

TravelGretta said...

What kind of ice cream? Come on. You buried the lead!