MM and I have clearly hit the point in our relationship when one of us never goes home. That’s him. He hasn’t ventured back to his condo since before we left for the race in Cincinnati.
I think it’s normal for a couple to favor one person’s house over the other’s, either because of convenience or space or that’s just where everyone’s stuff ended up. But when our dating reached the point of regular sleepovers, I always assumed we would lean toward staying at his place -- in his shiny and fairly new two-bedroom condo with laundry in unit, central air, and a dishwasher. Sure, it’s a little less convenient than my place, but seriously -- Laundry in unit! Central air! Dishwasher! My one bedroom apartment doesn’t begin to compare size-wise or amenity-wise. People, I don’t even have an outlet in my bathroom! But as it turns out, we’ve taken up couple residence at my place.
I only became aware of this within the last month or so, when I finally realized that I’m regularly trying to find an appropriate location for the duffel bag he’s been living out of. When we returned from Cincinnati, I told him, “I might be able to clean out half of a drawer for you.” I’m so giving.
This morning, he told me he was going to hang around the apartment for awhile and get some work done. I responded, “Do you live here now?” Not in the “go home” tone, but in the “maybe it really is time to do something about this” tone. Frankly there’s not enough room for us in my place, and I’m not super comfortable with his nomadic tendencies.
The truth is we’ve already started talking about living together. I’m not sure I should post this on my blog, but what the hell, right? There are various logistical concerns beginning with him owning and me refusing to live in the area of town where his condo is located. And, I’m not exactly sure where those concerns end. But, we’re moving forward to see if there are feasible options.
The point is, it may not happen, but I think he and I are “there.” “There” being that head space where we are both ready to make a place our home. That’s my girly interpretation anyway.
No more living out of duffel bags, no more half of a drawer propositions. If living together doesn't work out at this point, I'm going to have to buy a second dresser and he's going to have to start forwarding his mail.